Emotional Competency Development Guidelines
Self-awareness
Self-Awareness | Self-Management | Social Awareness | Relationship Management
This section provides detailed definitions of each of the 7 competencies of Self-Management. In addition, suggested development activities, books to read, and movies to watch have been provided to aid you in your personal competency development plan.
Self-Management Competencies
Developmental Tips
- Deals calmly with stress
- Displays impulse control and restraint
- Stays poised and positive, even in trying moments
This is the ability to keep your impulsive feelings and emotions under control. It is being able to restrain negative actions when provoked, when faced with opposition or hostility from others, or when working under pressure. The person who possesses the competency Emotional Self-Control
- Make a list of all the things that cause you to "lose it" (your triggers). Create a strategy to prevent these triggers from causing you to lose your composure and your self-control.
- Reduce your stress through physical activity or other types of conscious relaxation techniques (yoga, exercise, gardening, taking a bath, etc.)
- Attend a stress management workshop.
- Is authentic "what you see is what you get"
- Takes tough, principled stands, even if they are unpopular
- Confronts unethical action in others
This competency can best be described as taking action that is consistent with what you say and value. It includes communicating intentions, ideas, and feelings openly and directly and welcoming openness and honesty in others. You show integrity and take responsibility for your own behavior and performance. You build trust through reliability and authenticity. The person who possesses the competency Trustworthiness.
- Spend some time exploring the values and principles that you feel most strongly about. Write down the most important ones. Next to each one, examine whether your behavior is consistent with these values. Ask yourself what you would need to do differently in order to live more genuinely and be true to your beliefs.
- Consider the issues on which you are willing to act against all opposition. Clarify for yourself what is and is not worth fighting for. If an opportunity comes up to act on a principle, take it, but be sure you are certain of your ground.
- Reading: Principle-Centered Leadership, Stephen Covey, 1992.
- Follows through on commitments
- Is careful in his/her work
- Shows attention to detail
This competency is about taking responsibility for your personal performance. It reflects an underlying drive for being reliable and delivering quality work. You work in a careful and organized manner, paying attention to detail, following through on commitments and promises, and building trust through reliability.
The person who possesses the competency Conscientiousness
- Keep a detailed filing system for all monthly bills: telephone, rent, heat, credit cards, etc.
- Build routine checks into your calendar to ensure adherence to deadlines, policies, and standards. In the event that you find something that does not reach the desired standard or that will take much longer than the time frame given, work through your plan to give the task at hand more time and effort.
- Reading: A Passion for Excellence, Tom Peters, 1986.
- Smoothly juggles multiple demands
- Easily handles shifting priorities and rapid change
- Adapts plans, behavior, or approaches to fit major changes in situations
This is the ability to be flexible and work effectively within a variety of changing situations and with various individuals and groups. People with this competency are willing to change their own ideas or perceptions on the basis of new information or evidence. They are able to alter standard procedures when necessary, and juggle multiple demands as required. The person who possesses the competency Adaptability:
- Periodically review the processes you or your department has in place. What are the strengths and weaknesses of each? Is there a better, more efficient way of approaching things?
- When current strategies are not working, stop what you are doing, acknowledge that it is not working, and make the necessary adjustment to your plans, activities, objectives, or behavior. Be willing to make some midcourse adjustments when things are not going well or when situations demand change.
- Reading: Strategies for Fast Growing Times, N. Booh, 1997.
- Sees opportunities rather than threats
- Has mainly positive expectations about others
- Has hopes that the future will be better than the past
This competency is about seeing the world as a glass that is "half-full" rather than "half-empty. This is the ability to see good in others and in the situation at hand. Threats are viewed merely as opportunities that can be acted upon and taken advantage of to achieve optimal outcomes. The person who possesses the competency Optimism:
- For two or three days, make a list of all the threats or adversities you encountered. Note your response to them. For example: Adversity: You were cut off in traffic. Response: "What a jerk." Adversity: You got stinging criticism on an important paper. Response: "Those were helpful comments." Next write down the consequences of each your responses. For example, "I fumed all the way to work," or "I reworked my paper based on the comments." Note that when your responses or feelings are pessimistic in nature, positive activity is curtailed, but when they are positive, positive energy flows. Try to change your "self-talk" from negative to positive.
- Reading: Learned Optimism, M. E. P. Seligman, 1990.
- Anticipates obstacles to a goal
- Takes calculated risks
- Sets measurable goals
This competency shows a concern for working toward a standard of excellence. This standard may be a personal need to improve your performance over past accomplishments, to outperform others, or even to surpass the greatest accomplishment ever achieved.
The person who possesses the competency Achievement Orientation
- Consider using some projects you are currently working on to practice Achievement Orientation. Create some moderate risk goals or an innovative solution for your project. Regularly monitor your progress against your plan. Discuss your progress with another person. This will help you understand the implications of your work and your accomplishment against plan.
- Keep a log of where you demonstrated the behaviors of Achievement Orientation. At the end of each day or week think about how well you anticipated obstacles; decide if you took any risks during the course of your work, and if you made any progress toward your work/personal goals.
- Reading: The Leadership Challenge: How to Get Extraordinary Things Done in Organizations, J. M. Kouzes and B. Z. Poser, Jossey-Bass, 1987.
- Acts rather than waits
- Seeks information in unusual ways
- Cuts through red tape and bends the rules when necessary
This is the ability to identify a problem, obstacle, or opportunity and take action on it. People who show initiative are consistently striving to do better, to experience new challenges and opportunities, and to be held accountable for their actions and ideas. The person who possesses the competency Initiative:
- Volunteer to be a leader of a service organization that markets its information to the community and solicits funds for support.
- Make a list of all the external factors that affect your department (e.g., economy, student needs, competing institutions). Make a similar list of all the internal factors affecting your department (e.g., leadership styles, organizational strategies and goals, political maneuvering). Looking at both lists, identify changes, emerging trends, and opportunities or problems. Map out in detail the steps you need to take in order to capitalize on those opportunities or take actions to prevent significant problems.
- Reading: The Art of the Long View, P. Schwartz, 1996.
